Accountability, Guilt, and the Stories We Tell Ourselves

A recent cat show made me realize something about myself. My friend, who was supposed to join me, couldn’t make it again due to work. It wasn’t the first time. I felt disappointed. At the same time, I found myself questioning whether I should continue showing Conan. Part of me wondered if I was being selfish. Conan is not the strongest show cat in the ring. He may eventually achieve his Grand title, but the journey will likely be long. […]

Part 1: Am I Lost, Or Am I Just Looking For A Different Kind Of Growth?

A conversation with a friend recently made me realise something. The work I do today spans a surprisingly wide range of responsibilities. Product thinking, project management, eCommerce operations, process improvement, analytics, content, systems, stakeholder management, and occasionally getting hands-on when needed. It made me wonder: “Am I becoming a full-stack product manager?” Then another question followed shortly after. “Or am I actually lost?” Looking Back At A Previous Chapter When I reflected on periods of my career where I felt […]

When Helping Others Starts Turning Into Quiet Resentment

For a long time, I thought my frustration toward certain people meant: Especially when I reacted internally to situations like: Part of me kept wondering:“Am I becoming cold?” But after reflecting more deeply, I realised the issue was not lack of empathy. The real issue was exhaustion from carrying too much. The Pattern I Started Noticing I realised I naturally become: Especially in: Because I tend to: Over time, people like this often quietly become the “buffer” in a group. […]

What ChatGPT Observed About Me After Hours Of Conversations

At one point, I asked ChatGPT a simple question: “What have you learned about me from all these conversations?” What came back was not a personality test result or motivational quote. It was more like reading a behavioural reflection written by a neutral coach who had been observing recurring patterns over time. Some parts felt accurate immediately.Some parts made me uncomfortable.Some parts explained behaviours I had never fully connected before. This post is not about whether AI “knows” someone deeply. […]

When Friendship, Values, And Animal Ethics Stop Aligning

I used to think disappointment in friendships mostly came from obvious betrayal or conflict. But sometimes, the discomfort comes quietly. You slowly notice that someone you thought shared similar values actually operates very differently than you do. Not necessarily wrong. Just different in ways that create emotional friction. A friend became close to someone whose views about pedigree cats and sourcing I strongly disagreed with. Objectively, this should not have affected me that much. But internally, I kept circling around […]

Why Some People’s “Excited Sharing” Secretly Irritates Us

Recently, I realised I kept feeling oddly irritated whenever a friend excitedly shared her learning journey in a group chat. In this case, she had just started learning something I had learned few years back. She kept sharing discoveries, thoughts, and updates with enthusiasm. Objectively, nothing was wrong. But internally, I kept thinking:“Why does this feel so extra?” Then came the guilt:“Am I being mean?”“Am I jealous?”“Am I cold?” The deeper I analysed myself, the more uncomfortable I became. After […]

When Your Brain Keeps Running “What If” Scenarios Nonstop

A late-night reflection with ChatGPT turned into this post because recently, I realised my brain has been constantly branching into “what if” scenarios. Not only for major life decisions. Even small things became mentally exhausting. Examples: Every situation seemed to split into multiple possible outcomes. And before I could even complete one task, my brain already started simulating: At one point, even resting felt difficult because my brain refused to stop anticipating. How This Usually Starts At first, anticipatory thinking […]

Feeling stuck

I’m not sure if people around my age are experiencing this, but here I am. The feeling that I’m stuck or don’t feel motivated to do anything is kinda lingering a little bit longer this time. I had few moments of “spikes” where I feel a little more motivated or gaining my “let’s do it” spirit, but often times it went flat again. Don’t laugh at me, but lately i’ve been using my situation for learning how to use ChatGPT […]