to live, to experience and to share
describing a glimpse of kartika angkawijaya daily activity, some events which intrigue her thinker side trying to find out the answers for them
The other intrusive thought this week came after my encounter with a cat feeder in my area. She was upset because one of the community cats she feeds looked sick and weak. She told me and another rep from a welfare group that she felt depressed because of this. She then insisted we need to help the cat and conveniently shifted the responsibility to us. She said she did not know how to bring the cat to a clinic. She […]
This week I’ve been trying to unpack my intrusive thoughts about the upcoming reunion. To be honest, I feel more chore than joy. My high school years never felt like a space where I belonged. The clearest example was the religion teacher who doubled as the student organization’s counselor. He openly said the organization would only accept students from religion ABC. Other religions were out. I was shortlisted as a representative for my class, but in the end I wasn’t […]
I’m not sure if people around my age are experiencing this, but here I am. The feeling that I’m stuck or don’t feel motivated to do anything is kinda lingering a little bit longer this time. I had few moments of “spikes” where I feel a little more motivated or gaining my “let’s do it” spirit, but often times it went flat again. Don’t laugh at me, but lately i’ve been using my situation for learning how to use ChatGPT […]
Without realising, year changed and I’m still struggling to be back to blog regularly despite I have many thoughts from time to time. I’ll be back to that topic in a bit. The reason I feel want to go back to write because yesterday I had interesting convo with one of my neighbors. A while ago, I bumped to an uncle who stood by a tree and looked up searching for something when I was on the way to buy […]
I know, it’s way way late for this. There had been some internal monologue happened offline. To post or not to post. My brain brought me to a rabbit hole of thinking why is this and why is that. It’s constant internal struggle. Sometimes I also wonder why. I didn’t have such a struggle last time. I can channel my thought without any issues. There was a period of time when you feel “alone”. Because you and your friends are […]
Last week I was about to write a post related to pain when you’re holding on things too long, which was resonates well with what happened to me last week. What really happened was I didn’t write it. I was having cramps and made me didn’t feel like want to do anything. Earlier this week I had situation with my foster cat. He started acting up (meowing at night) which hasn’t been done for months. I might have short fuse […]
It’s time for the (work) mid year review.. (oh no) That’s what I feel this week. I did my homework, preparing about things to discuss with boss. I was quite confident that I’m okay this time. But I wasn’t. Again I was humbled. That after the session I went spiral down that I’m not good enough, my justification was seen as excuse, why I can’t meet certain goal up to this year. Tried to voice out, but feels just slammed […]
Surgeons are put through rigorous tests just to get in the game. We endure decades of anxiety-provoking acronyms. SAT. MCAT. USMLE. ABSITE. And if we pass that gauntlet, we are rewarded with the need to log 850 surgeries and take an 8-hour multiple choice and oral exam. There is almost no time to take in the victory. Or even a nap. Researchers studied why some people perform better on tests. They found that it’s not necessarily related to intelligence. Some […]