It’s been a long while.. since last entry to the blog site. I know, I told myself that I want to go back to blogging regularly, but somehow this and that are preventing me to go back to something I enjoy in the past. It’s been awhile that I sit down and have a chat with my mind. Let’s start with what happened recently. First, on role being made redundant in June. I wasn’t expecting this at all. I was […]
Category: attitude
anything that helps kartika angkawijaya during hard times, inspires or motivate her to go through those times
Happy New Year 2024
I know, it’s way way late for this. There had been some internal monologue happened offline. To post or not to post. My brain brought me to a rabbit hole of thinking why is this and why is that. It’s constant internal struggle. Sometimes I also wonder why. I didn’t have such a struggle last time. I can channel my thought without any issues. There was a period of time when you feel “alone”. Because you and your friends are […]
About overwhelmed
It’s time for the (work) mid year review.. (oh no) That’s what I feel this week. I did my homework, preparing about things to discuss with boss. I was quite confident that I’m okay this time. But I wasn’t. Again I was humbled. That after the session I went spiral down that I’m not good enough, my justification was seen as excuse, why I can’t meet certain goal up to this year. Tried to voice out, but feels just slammed […]
About taking test
Surgeons are put through rigorous tests just to get in the game. We endure decades of anxiety-provoking acronyms. SAT. MCAT. USMLE. ABSITE. And if we pass that gauntlet, we are rewarded with the need to log 850 surgeries and take an 8-hour multiple choice and oral exam. There is almost no time to take in the victory. Or even a nap. Researchers studied why some people perform better on tests. They found that it’s not necessarily related to intelligence. Some […]
About Humility
How good are you in … Was one of the most memorable question asked to me this week. During chat with a friend around strength and weakness, she noticed that I diverted to say what is my strength, so she asked why it was so hard for me to say it. I replied my friend that because I don’t think I’m good enough, as there is someone better than me. And maybe it’s the upbringing thing that made me can’t […]
Hello 2022
It’s been awhile I haven’t been blogging here. But this year I’m planning to be more regularly back to this space. I don’t like to rant usually. But let’s take it this time is special come back Sometimes it’s irritating when you’re sharing your thought process about your finding and the other party just say that I’m anyhow and saying it with condescending vibe that I’m such a failure When you’re doing analysis there are many ways If I […]
Ideally we should ..
How often you say that inside your head? Or “by right, ..” and some other similar phrase. I have those moments last week which made me stress out because I want to do things in certain way and expecting certain result or outcome. But it didn’t happen. I was feeling down, demoralized and questioning myself if I do it right? To the extent that I kept messaging my friends in group chat. I lose my confident. The result was bad […]
About putting trust first
Trust is something you build on over time and earn. It’s not something you can just get from other people. I learned it from a comic book back then during my high school days. As I grow up, I have my moments when I tend to second guess people and doubt them. I feel worried if I need to trust people and they will disappoint me. So I decided to think all ways to prevent that. Some of my managers […]