“Hey K, why is this like that?” Or “why so and so treats me in that manner?” is one of the common example of many questions asked to me by colleagues and friends.
“why” can give you the answer of the cause, when you ask it to the right person. But most of the times, we take the liberty assuming that the person we ask will have some share or some say to it hence we expected some explanation.
But it’s not happening that way, all the time.
I usually will try to ask “regarding xxx topic, do you know anything or details about it?” When I’m curious and not sure about if the person I’m asking it to will know the answer. Because it gives the benefit of the doubt about the other party is the right person to answer. Also, it is less attacking that person, especially, if we asked it in interrogative tone. Consciously or unconsciously.
I find it strangely, no matter how busy you are in your day, or at work, you can always try to squeeze some time for other person’s request if they treat you well. It is the people connection and how we treat each other with respect or not.
On the “how” part, I also think it’s good for invitation to think the problem together. Which can be a time to know your friends better, their point of view and so on.
Don’t you think so?