Breaking out from our shell

Last week we have a year end dinner with colleagues and as usual, there was an award presentation for long service with the company.

One of them is our top leader.

In his acceptance speech, he said that he was quite laid back person until his wife decided to quite her work, to focus on their family. He added that his wife was having a good career, better than him. At that point of time.

Her sacrifice made him able to focus on his career. To evolve into the current him.

I find his sharing about earlier part of his life journey was quite inspirational.

At that party I asked myself, when will I have that moment? To have the heart to leave some of the things I really like to do now and focus on the few activities only.

I find it easy to adopt a new thing, make it to be a habit, but I have difficulties cutting them down. Eventually I dropped a few to date, through “natural selection”. As the time goes and I don’t have time to do it. And mostly my logical self made me to do the important things first.

It also reminded me of what one of my friend told me sometime back. That at certain stage of my life, I’ll turn into someone who is boring and safe. He sees me as someone who thinks life is like adventure and big playground.

(Phew)

I haven’t found the answer yet, whether I’ll change quite drastically, or when I’ll have that moment, or what kind of person I’ll be in 5 or 10 years time.

But one thing I know, life is like running a marathon. It’s a long run. Rushing it won’t help me to reach it faster as I might ran out gas earlier and walk at much slower pace to complete it.

Do you have similar experience like this? Did you find the answer? How did you overcome it?

The Perks of Being a Wallflower

I thought this is a teen drama like Juno, but I was wrong. It was deeper than just a drama. This movie drew my attention while browsing what movie I should watch during flight to Shanghai because of Emma Watson and Ezra Miller. You know Emma Watson, but Ezra caught my attention because of The Flash in Justice League.

And with Ant-Man inside too.

There are many memorable lines, but there are two which I find very memorable:

One, which I feel so meaningful is

Sam: Why do I and everyone I love pick people who treat us like we’re nothing?

Charlie: We accept the love we think we deserve

which actually what Bill, Charlie’s teacher told him earlier.

It made me think, that are we being picky then? Or will you stay in bad relationship and endure it, because you think you’re not deserve better?

Anyway, I’ll let that line linger in my mind for awhile.

Second line which I really like is

We can’t choose where we come from but we can choose where we go from there

quote

It’s just like the water which gives hope in the desert. Okay I was being too dramatic here.

By the way, there is a continuation of the conversation between Charlie and Bill

Charlie: Can we make them know that they deserve more?

Bill: We can try.

So, it’s really a good movie. It made me laugh, cry and think about many things. If you haven’t watched it, give it a go.

And let me know what do you think. Or share your fave lines from the movie.

Mid week random thought

After watching Thor Ragnarok I found a new MarvelOTP #Thorki

chibi thorki

I used to adore #Clintasha who is portmanteau from Clint Barton and Natasha Romanov

Anyway with the army of Marvel fan in Tumblr or Pinterest, it’s easy to be sucked in into world of shipping, really. You can find many pairings too.

Then I saw a post saying “when you shipped your OTP, it’s actually something that you look for in your relationship”

(I can’t seem to be able to find the post anymore. It took me awhile to post this, because I was hoping to find the post)

So, looking at my OTP list, no wonder I’m still single. I’ll need to find another OTP then 🙂

My first “ultra” run

This is the last sport check list item in 2017 to be cleared, and it’s a huge one too. People say close it with a bang. So I guess this is mine for 2017.

Usually I plan my sport till mid year and leave the second half for the non-sport resolution but I notice that I was slacking off, really, in 2016. So I’m trying to spread it out till end of year.

As I’m going to the event in my head the image of Valkyrie from Thor Ragnarok saying “Here we go” is getting stronger.

Pre-race thought

In my checklist, besides gears, there are others like nervous or excitement, which seems taking turns.

Preparation is something I always feel not there yet, but I take it that life is like that too. Sometimes you just need to dive in head first. Although having enough preparation will make you more confident and less injury.

Oh right.. To my friends who are taking JLPT, let’s do our best. I’ll contribute my “JLPT”.

My friend said take it easy, one kilometer at a time, which I’ll say that to myself. Many times later.

Post-race thought

I feel cheated! Because I signed up for 42.195km but it seems not only me who has distance discrepancy

Will I run full marathon again? Maybe.. I’ll give another thought after recovery

I’ll skip the drama before the race, as my running buddy like to say, every run is unique by itself. And the drama is part of the bundle.

From the start, I told myself that I don’t need to rush, it’s really tempting to run faster when the road is clear, or sucked by people around you. This is my race not theirs. So, no matter how tempting it is, stick to your plan. And it did work! Despite few stitches I had after 30km mark. I stopped for stretch and put some Salonpas. As saying said, don’t forget to sharpen your weapon.

What stressed me was to reach the 38+km before 12:30, as it was stated the cut off timing. After experiencing drama in the morning, I only flagged off around 6+. But maybe that stress gave me an extra push?

And, I did shout to 41km sign, how I love to see it. Hah!

Although I just barely made it to the finish line, the silver lining is I have the photographer to take few nice shots for me (or at least I thought so :D)

Never try, never know. And I tried.

2 bananas, 6 Gu gels, 1 Wieder jelly, 1 Gu Chomp, few Face ID problems, and countless 100Plus Active and water.. (incl trips to toilet) later, I crossed the finish line.

Yes, this post is half written pre-race and the other half is post-race. I can’t possibly write while running, right?

The essence for our growth

I: Isn’t it fun getting better at the job?

C: it is

I: isn’t that the main strand of your career that you’re getting better at the job

C: well, it could only get better, it couldn’t get worse

Inspiration of the week is a chat by Cate (C) Blanchett and Sir Ian (I) McKellen in Actors on Actors show (link)

They were discussing about things they are not so good at (geez, they are so humble, o’rite). Cate replied Ian that she feels they just need to be asked by someone to do it (as a challenge for themselves)

In imaginary world, if I’m an actor, I think my bosses will be the director of the show. They are the one who set the movie direction. And I just need to do my best as certain role in the movie.

I’m guessing that directors also have their own unique style, perhaps like Quentin Tarantino or Michael Bay or Peter Jackson.

Clashes are unavoidable and uncontrollable, but our respond to it is controllable. As there was a conflict happened this week and I can’t help to keep thinking about it. I kept asking why to myself to the extent it hounded me.

However listening to Cate and Ian, I feel that after it’s all happened in the past, their present self can just laugh at it. They grew from their past self.

The image of 7 deadly sins comic starts to appear in my mind when I was hounded by the incident. That I was activating Pride and Wrath in me. And what I need to activate is Acceptance now. So, don’t feel angry or sad, just be better. One step at a time.

Thing happens for a reason. As always.

Ask and you’ll be given. Whether it’s something important for your growth or the answer to your problem.

What do you think?

Extra note:

Doesn’t time feel so fast passing by when you are in the last quarter of the year?

I flipped through my agenda and find that October inspiration page was blank. Although I had my October filled with activities.

November, on the other hand, has been giving me valuable lessons. It also the M-1 for the big event early Dec.

Inspiration of the week

Sometimes it’s good not to have too much time because it gives you too much time to think. When you have extra time, you have room for doubts and you will not listen to your instinct – Tom Hiddleston in conversation hosted by SAG-AFTRA Foundation (link)

I was listening to some of his appearance in past talk show because I was curious about his work outside MCU. And after few talks, I feel I’m sharing the same sentiment with Zachary Levi the host in the Nerd HQ 2013 when Tom talked about his enthusiasm about ancient Greece or Shakespeare, can make him feel uncultured.

But joke aside, I think he really gives his all when doing something, like to know the script of the play or movie he’s in as how he remembered Happy Birthday. He said it’s a matter of drilling and repetition.

He could be just putting up a show, but it seems to me, he’s genuine.

Sometimes lesson reached you through something you least expected

Do you remember why you started something?

Last week when I participated in a rally run with few office colleagues, and one of them was one of the youngest in the office. He said, he’s hoping he can be converted to a perm staff as he knows more people, he started to feel like home.

And I can feel his enthusiasm or spirit. (As if in Dragon Ball anime?)

It’s easy to start something, but to keep doing it consistently is hard.

That’s what I thought before, but recently I think it’s because I forgot the purpose of doing it what makes me stop doing something.

Or, it could be just self-imposed mini mission. When you completed it, I don’t find any additional mission or purpose to keep doing it.

For example, when I was learning guitar few years ago. I just want to learn something which I’ve been wanting to learn since I was kid. But I rarely practice or playing it these days.

I flipped my agenda the other day, I wrote “remember why you started” in May, during one of the big change in my life. It gave me some flash backs about the beginning of the journey.

One thing that blogging helps me to be better is

The phone buzzed, a reminder to blog showed up. Ah, it’s time for it again.

Sometimes I have the idea around mid week, and I started to write it, set it on schedule and when the reminder showed up, just ticked it, and I’m done.

There are also days when I don’t have the idea until the reminder is showing. Or, on top of that, I have other commitments which made me unable to set aside a time to write.

So, I asked myself, did the week just pass by with nothing interesting happened to me? Or without learning something from it.

That question reminds me of my sensei’s statement to us during classroom. As she likes to ask random question to us, like do you meet strange people while going to class, or do you find a money on the street, so on, my classmate and I tend to be quiet. Partially, we are thinking how to answer her, and the other half, is trying to recollect of those happened to us.

She’s jokingly saying, that we are not interested in the world outside ours (i.e. phone).

And I find it somewhat true.

Most of the times, I don’t pay attention to what happened around me during commuting, it’s all going on auto-pilot mode, leave the house, lock the door, walk to MRT, get the EZ link card, tap on the gate, go up to platform, wait for the train, hop in (or squeeze in) and so on.

Speaking about this auto-pilot mode reminded me of an old talk by Ajahn Brahm. That we are not living in the present and lack of awareness.

And the funny thing is, both of them suggested similar method. For example, instead of always turn right after a building, we turn right earlier or later (but make sure there is a path to go to our destination), we might see different things along the way. Or, when you brush your teeth, do you always start from the left side or from the right side, top half of the mouth first or the other area of the mouth first?

Back to the question I asked myself, yes, I have one or two events which I found it memorable. I’ll share here some other time. Thanks to that, I’m able to remember more important lesson, which is to be in the present moment.

How about you, can you remember all the events happened to you last week? Or maybe your lunches.

PS: this view might be the opposite of why Mark Zuckerberg and Steve Jobs always wear the same color shirt and same jeans everyday. They prioritize making decision over choosing a style. Hence they go auto-pilot on wardrobe.