Being compared

When I was a kid, my mom likes to compare me and my brother (probably to him too). She told that I don’t have the touch for art while he has it. So when it comes to create something, he got better marks. So, I grew up by believing that I’m not talented for it.

One day I had a talk with Mr. James (not real name). He’s asking me how do I feel about my artistic side. I explained like what I believed above. Mr. James also knows that I like to take photos. He asked me how do I describe my photos. I said, it’s still long way to go to become a great photographer.

He replied, “I think you’re good enough. You have the eye for visuals. Maybe your mom see it differently.”.

His reply surprised me, so I asked him why he thinks so. And he explained:

  1. Everyone has their own way in defining abstract things like art.
  2. Like old saying said, above mountains there are clouds. So, you’re good, but there are others who are better. How you see yourself reflects how comfortable you are with yourself. Like Bruno Mars song, just the way you are. Perspective matters. Be confident.
  3. Learn from other people whom you think better than you. Bring yourself up, don’t bring others down. You will never grow by doing that.
  4. Never compare your progress with others, compare it with yourself. What do you see in you 1 year ago or maybe 5 years ago, and what do you see now. If you think you don’t make much progress, evaluate why you didn’t make much progress and do something to achieve it.

I’m glad that in 2012 I found mentors around me like Mr. James, whom helps me to see things from new perspective.

To conclude, if you’re being compared with your siblings/friends, then I hope my story above can motivate you to take the situation differently.