continuing from previous post..
I went back to my hometown for celebrating Lunar New Year with my family on 3rd week of Jan and the holiday is going to end soon. I will be back to Singapore tomorrow and will be back to work on Thursday.
Mostly I spent my times with my family (of course) and my friends in between. It brings all the memory that we had at school back. We had been graduated 8 years ago and a lot of things happened in between. Marriage, children, change jobs, move house and many more. And yet, I still feel the same fighting spirit and despite that most of us have left our hometown yet we still have the same thinking.
I used to wonder that we used to be able to work well as a team but somehow we are at our best when we are not in the same team. I used guess that maybe our characteristics are too similar to each other so we have those fights. Now, I have different answer. I guess, our task is to keep challenge each other to make other places to be a better place too. It’s a form of rivalry to make the place we are at, to be better than before; so that when we meet each other again, we can share story about our adventure.
I found the answer why I was so bored lately which leads to do things that I didn’t do usually. It was rivalry.
I was in the social media thing by myself. I was blogging by myself. And I was also sitting in my comfort zone at office too. Basically, I was living in a peace environment. It’s too plain for me; therefore it hit me in the end. Strange huh? I’m stress because of peace. Not to mention that I was listening to my friends too much until the extent that I lose myself just to make myself agreeable with their opinion or to avoid arguments. And sometimes, I just mellowed to give up my dreams and just to follow the stream.
In a way, rivalry can be a bad thing. But, the other side of it is, it makes us excited to be a better person to be able to surpass our rival. I realize that because of “Bakuman” (and that’s the reason why I like shonen manga more). Or like what Steve Jobs used to say, the feeling of becoming newbie again is exciting.
Oh well, I think maybe because that’s what youth about. Like a saying the older the person is, the more they want to avoid conflicts and unconsciously I live like that too. When I want something and my friends said the opposite, it dampens my spirit and in the end I decided to let it go. So in the end, I ended up in the middle of nowhere.
So, I’m challenging myself this year, that I will be more like myself (I should listen to Linkin Park – Numb more). To be comfortable with who I am, I don’t need to be all out when meeting friends but as it goes, if it’s a true friends we will understand each other and more importantly, accept each other.
Second challenge is, to be honest about my feelings. If I have doubts, I will clarify with the respective party. Just be straight forward.
Third challenge is, to use my time wisely. I want to pass my JLPT this year. I also need to exercise regularly. And to build up my reputation as web developer, if it’s my true passion.
Fourth challenge is, to give it all. When I have decided on it, I must do it with all my might, even if it will disturb the balance for a while. It’s normal to have the ups and downs but remember the goals. (or maybe I should re-read “Bakuman” comic again)
I promise myself those. As I’m going to end this post, I have a question for you. Have you set your goals? 🙂
PS: I decided to separate it because it’s too long to be read as one post.
