If someone told you that out of reason, then what would your react? Or maybe, some people say something which you feel that the person should not say that to you because it’s somewhat sensitive for you.
Will you be angry or upset to the person or you’re just gonna cool with it?
Before I tell you mine, I’d like to share some stories I remember from Ajahn Brahm. On one of his talk, he mentioned about how to overcome our anger. Some of his points are, instead of focusing on the anger itself, we should try to see other things. The person may not be realize that it would be issues for us – that’s the positive way to see the person. Or, instead of trying to analyze the words, or the person or whatever aspect in that incident, he advised just agree to it. The person who said it may even more furious to us, because his attempt to rob our peace and happiness is not working 🙂
Okay, I’m not very patient type of person, though that sometimes my tolerance can be considered quite good. But, my reactions when someone told me some nasty things – purposely or not, were varied from nothing to somewhat upset. I don’t want to be hypocrite by saying that I always cool with it. But sometimes I do really upset when people told me that. Well, I would say it’s just not my day, though that it’s only a reason to defend our position :p
Once I read an article about health, it explains that to be happy, we need much lesser amount of muscle in our face compared to form an angry face. No wonder, people look older when they easily angry, don’t they?
On one of his stories, he mentioned about a very poisonous snake who tried to be enlighten by trying not to kill human in a village nearby. But, the village people were testing his patience by keep poking him, throwing him rocks and do whatever things just to test his patience.
Sounds familiar? Or heard the story before? 🙂
Then one day, the snake was really can’t take it anymore, he bite on a boy who toss him a rock. Obviously, the boy died because of the poison of the snake, since the snake is a top breed in poisonous snake.
After knowing that the boy was passed away because of him, the snake was very disappointed and go back to his snake community – even snake has community doesn’t it? If it’s not, anyway this is just a story and now I’m the story teller, so it’s up to me to create this version.
Back to the snake.. The snake told his best friend about what just happened, then his friend who also tried to be a good snake told how fool he was. Maybe, to be a good snake requires a huge effort not to hurt people since it’s our snake nature to hurt people, but it doesn’t mean that you can’t hiss. You still can hiss, to warn the villagers, can’t you?
The snake was speechless (O.o) –> maybe this can be a little illustration for the snake expression hahaha..
When I heard about this story, I was laughing inside my heart. Why do I let some people / words control me or take away my peace. Instead of focusing on the words, why don’t I try the bigger picture. Or, maybe if I was upset, just “hiss”, don’t necessarily “bite” the person wasn’t it?
There are many different ways which may works for you which I can share. Sometimes, when I was super angry, I may leave and have my quiet time alone, let it cool down and get back to my usual routine. Or, I imagine someone, can be my teacher, can be my idol, can be anyone whom I admire, I will put my shoes into that person. How would the person I imagine would react to this. Most of the people I imagined will just laugh at it as laugh at how silly a kid will react to this. So, somehow I laugh as well and I forgot why I was upset in the first place or what was made me upset. 🙂
To conclude, I don’t give it a – borrowing from Lt Thrace from Battlestar Galactica – frak anymore, you can say whatever you like to say. I’ll take it that you give me chances to practice my patience and even to be more tolerate towards other people. You can get what you want and I can get what I want too. So, everyone is happy, yeah?
Sabbe satta bhavantu sukhitatta. Let’s all being be happy.
Good nite and have good rest 🙂